******CAUTION: vulnerability here ******
Top Five DON’TS
. . . when someone reaches out for financial help.
5) Ignore them altogether. It’s OK to say “I cannot contribute, AND I am pulling for ya.” The person reaching out could probably use those words of encouragement.
4) Judge them harshly. For whatever the reason, the person is in a situation where they need financial support. It’s OK to ask for more information to inform your decision – don’t assume you really know the whole story and I suggest you ask privately.
3) Share your judgment . . . ever . . . privately or publicly with the person making the request. These requests are not up for public debate and conversation of the social implications. It’s OK to ignore them if you are judging them harshly – keep it to yourself. You have NO idea how difficult it may have been for the person to ask for such support.
2) Rebuff the gift. If someone has offered a gift in exchange for your contribution, please consider accepting it. It is the path of their integrity. It’s also OK to allow them more time to create and deliver the gift 🙂
1) Any of the above . . . can create . . . a sorta cloud o’ ick floating around in the ‘verse.
Yup, I started with a bunch of don’ts. Just sayin’ . . . it’s another perspective. I blame no one for my responses, btw. Anyone that knows me, knows that I understand that how I think, affects how I feel 🙂 The negativity was pretty self-inflicted.
The “Don’ts” are as much for me, as they are for anyone that they might resonate for. It is about how I want to create my future relationships.
In the last few weeks, I have experienced a WIDE range of emotions. From shame and isolation and all things in between that, to EXTREME gratitude and a warm-blanky-feeling of love from those that have understood this effort and made a contribution. What a roller coaster ride. I feel a little rough around the edges right now.
Contributions have also come in other forms . . . moral support; sharing the campaign; a purchase from my Etsy store; fixes to my website; reviews of what I am about to post; a word of good cheer; cards; flowers; hugs . . . every little bit has been heartwarming to say the least.
This was a difficult request to make – of people I know, as well as people who are ‘strangers’ – and community, as I see it, and how this panned out, is a WHOLE ‘nother blog post 🙂
It took two weeks for me to actually make the request. It took another week for me to feel brave enough to share anything about it to my email list.
Money is energy. Money is a means of exchange. It is how I keep the lights on, gas in my car, eat food, feed the girlie, pay bills, feed my animals . . . stay in business with new product and materials for teaching AND keep my daughter in a school she has been in for 11 years.
I have ultimately worked something out – I am determined and creative like that. Devyn will stay in her school, five people will get fairies and a bunch o’ people will get cranes and poppies, (no one wanted a Magyk charm – watz up with that?).
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU . . . for all that you gave, all that I learned from this and mostly for the wealth of closer relationships we have created because I was willing to stand before you in the ‘emperor’s new clothes’ and you greeted me and put a blanket around me.
Thank you for contributing, giving me time on gifts, sharing the postings and demonstrating your love for me and my girl and extraordinary compassion for the circumstance I have created.
Enjoy the cranes and the poppies . Know that these are pieces of meaning . . . adornment of value. Devyn and I are both proud that you own one – or will own one 🙂
For those that ignored/judged/were soooooo uncomfortable by the request . . . be well and be happy. Know that it is likely that I have been where you are and if you ever made such a request and I did not respond, I am truly sorry. I now know how it feels. I am sorry, that you were made to feel uncomfortable. It was not my intent.
Energy exchanged is valuable to everyone . . . left unattended it just creates more chaos/white noise in the ‘verse.
Thank you – again, and again, and again . . . to everyone.
Much love and light,